The Scarlet “D”– Is God Angry with You Because of Divorce?

Did you ever read the book The Scarlet Letter? In the book, the lead character had to wear a big scarlet “A” because she was an adulterer. Labeled for life. Even her tombstone was marked with a scarlet “A.”

Adultery does not have to be involved for people who are going through divorce to feel like there’s a big “D” on their chest screaming “DIVORCED”.  As a Christian who has experienced divorce, I know this can be particularly true for people of faith who are aware that God intends for marriage to last a lifetime.

I never wanted to be divorced. Even so, I felt like I somehow let God down.

Yes, divorce is common in our society. On the other hand, if you’re a Christian you know God does not like divorce. You know he means for marriage to be a lifelong covenant.

Yet here you are divorced or facing divorce. This can be especially difficult. Are you wondering if God has disowned you or is angry with you? Do you think he is more distant because your marriage fell short of his design?

One woman told me she thought God would not let her into heaven. She was so wrong. Salvation is based on your acceptance of Jesus as your savior, not on your marital status.

So what’s the deal with you, God and divorce?

The Bible never says that God hates divorced people. God does not hate you. The Bible does say God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16.) Because God loves us, doesn’t it make sense that he would hate divorce? I think so.

Divorce hurts his children. Divorce breaks hearts and crushes spirits.

God does not hate you. In fact, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit,” says Psalms 34:18 (NIV.)

God has compassion for you in your pain. He washes you clean of any short-comings if you sincerely ask.

People who’ve never experienced divorce may not be able to have full compassion for your pain. But God does. Jesus died so you don’t have to wear a scarlet “D.” You are free to love God. You are blessed to be loved and supported by him as well.

Talk with God about your divorce. Thank him for his grace and compassion. Divorce does not keep God from loving you. You can have an open and loving relationship with God.

Christian Thought for the Day
For it is by grace that you have been saved, through faith—
and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—not by works, so that no one can boast.

Ephesians 2:8-9 NIV

Need Divorce Support?

  • Renee’s book Peace After Divorce will help you move to a point where divorce no longer pushes your emotional buttons.  Find out more about this book. 
  • You Can also Request Renee’s FREE eBook 5 Keys to Healing from Divorce by Using the Green Circle at the Top of This Page. 
  • Visit Renee’s Blog Archives to See Other Articles on Healing from Divorce.

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2 Comments on The Scarlet “D”– Is God Angry with You Because of Divorce?

  1. Heather Darnell says:

    I think when we rank divorce higher or lower than other things that separate us from God, we miss the Mark. God hates sin. As people we rank speeding and gluttony and “little white lies” as lesser sins , and murder, adultery, even divorce as “big ” ones.
    If we can accept that we are all imperfect, that we all fall, that we all needs God ‘s grace and redemption, and if we can ask Him for healing, we can experience a life much more fulfilling. Satan wants us trapped in the guilt. Because when we let that weigh us down, we don’t develop the full spiritual maturity God has designed for us.
    We need to not let our failings compound like that!
    Maybe we confuse the pain of divorce with punishment. I don’t know. I do know Gods love is bigger than any of it!

    • Renee Ettline says:

      Heather, thanks for commenting. You are so right. Getting trapped in guilt keeps us from full spiritual maturity. Why? Because hauling guilt around in our heads and hearts keeps us from fully experiencing the grace of God. God loves us so much. Jesus died so we can move forward with our lives. The pain of divorce isn’t punishment for divorce, it is a natural consequence of human choices. God’s grace delivers us!

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