Nothing is quite as fear provoking as instability combined with an unknown future. And isn’t that the story of separation and divorce–at least for a while. But fear doesn’t have to get the best of you. Here are seven steps you can take to harness fear in your life.
Squash the Power of Fear
1. Acknowledge that feeling fear is normal. Change is stressful for most people. Major life changes even more so. You’re not going crazy just because separation and divorce have created fear for you.
2. Make a list of your top fears. Well now doesn’t that just sound like fun? Yet, it helps. If you’re going to fight a battle you need to know who the enemy is so you can arm yourself accordingly.
3. Relax your body. Fear and anxiety can take their toll on your health. Several times a day consciously become aware of tension in your body. Relax those muscles and take a deep breath.
4. Put fear in perspective. Quite often, fear tricks the mind into magnifying potential dangers. Concerns become bigger than reality. If you let them, fears can dominate your life. Don’t let them!
5. Tame the beast. Even when you are scared and don’t have much confidence in yourself, confidence in God provides the strength to do what is needed to conquer the debilitating nature of fear. Faith in God is a bridge. It crosses the gap between the paralysis of fear, and the courage to act in the face of fear.”
Build your faith by praying and by learning more and more about God. You can count on His promises.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” (Isaiah 41:10 NIV)
6. Take action. Look at your list of fears and identify positive actions you can take to move through and past fear. Do you fear you can’t handle the challenges of everyday life alone? Develop a plan to simplify. If finances are a concern, make a budget or seeking out a financial planner. Attend a class such as Financial Peace University. Are you afraid of dating again? Relieve that stress by setting it aside until you have adequately healed from divorce. It will take time to work through all of the fears of separation and divorce but with God’s help you can do it and your life will be better!
7. Build a Support Network. Don’t wing it alone. Build a support network of resources to help you overcome your fears. Above all, filter your fears and your actions through prayer. Talking with God will add stability to your sense of well-being. Listen to God and He will direct your path. Trust in God and he will hold your hand and give you peace.
Faith in God is a bridge. It crosses the gap between the paralysis of fear, and the courage to act in the face of fear.”
From Peace after Divorce
You don’t have to live in fear. Follow the seven steps above and you will be on your way to squashing the fears that come with separation and divorce. Choose to get a grip on fear. Start today.
Christian Inspiration: For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7 NIV
What is your greatest fear as it relates to your separation and divorce? Please comment below.
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